inside out
and off balance
left of where it feels right
filling up the days
with empty plates
and leaking eyes, closed tight

i'm fast awake
and falling
loneliness i've made in tow
I have to wash away
what I've made so dark blue and gray
don't know

all i want is anything
and time to get back on my feet
to put my past ahead of me
move on from what it used to mean

i saw those things
i knew once
pictures falling off the paint
sinking hard like stones
they're leaving frames as mindful bones,
remain

holding hands
that fall apart
letting love fall where it lands
hearing words you said
it feels like fate you spoke instead
can't stand

all i want is anything
and time to get back on my feet
to put my past ahead of me
move on from what it used to mean

when you close your eyes
is it dark enough
to see what comes as dreams?
when you believe out loud
do you belong enough
to feel more than it seems
when you stand up straight
are you free enough
to say what says your heart?
when you feel like God
are you alive enough
to accept what falls apart?

i woke up
on the wrong side of the bed
and now i feel strange
like everything
across the midline
of my sheets and dreams
is like crossing
into a world that spins
a different way

there's a moment sometimes
when you can walk outside
and in one unadulterated instance
you can sense Heaven
when the clouds light up
like mirrors reflecting
all things good off of the earth
when the wind both cools and warms
and cradles you in comfort
it seeps into your nostrils
and buries deep in your skin
it whispers melodies in your ear
covers you in a deep feeling of peace
and all burdens once carried
shed off like falling leaves
it is in this moment
before life resumes in chaos
that you truly feel alive